The best way I can describe Girlie’s first year is “The Blur.” Between Sweet Boy‘s asthma and Girlie’s teething ear infections, there really was no time to be anything but a working mom. And I really didn’t feel like I was doing either part of it well.
Girlie had an ear infection on the weekend of my 40th birthday. My poor husband couldn’t do anything right. He offered to take the kids to day care so I could have some quiet time, and I snapped at him because it was half an hour out of his way. He offered to take the family to dinner and I told him I just wanted to stay home after five hours of sleep in the previous two nights.
At least I can say I was too tired to have any sort of 40ish mid-life crisis.
Mommy, Mommy, Mommy
Girlie was not easy when she wasn’t feeling well– still isn’t. She would only sit with me or her favorite day care teacher, and even that would only bring the crying down to a barely livable volume. If I left the room, everyone knew, including the neighbors. She got 16 teeth in eight months with an ear infection each time. She was really uncomfortable and really miserable for the first year. I think Girlie was about 18 months old before my husband felt like she didn’t hate him.
Sweet Boy’s asthma was really bad that year as well. He was on a three-tier preventative treatment program, but he still ended up at the pediatrician for steroids four times that winter. Poor kiddo was completely bonkers all winter. All that medicine left him completely unable to handle his emotions–something that is pretty difficult for a healthy 3-year-old.
It all became too much for me to handle. The doctor’s appointments, the weekly trips to the pharmacy, the exhaustion, the commuting, the non-stop crying, a husband with a very time-consuming job. I needed help, but there really wasn’t anywhere to turn.
Photo by quinn.anya 